Mendoza is brilliant! The end. x ha ha, I arrived at Mendoza Airport on 13th June, which feels like a lifetime ago now. I got stopped and searched for the 1st time and had my precious oranges squeezed (ahem) and taken from me. Charmin'. He gave me back the skanky, mashed banana which hadn't done too well in transit and threw my oranges. OK then...I admit I knew I wasn't allowed to travel with fruit but I was in the same country for goodness sake. It was worth a try. The 1st thing I noticed about Mendoza is the ability to breath clean, fresh air. The sun was bright and the air was crisp and the place had a real snow resort feel to it. The spring in my step was short lived however. Once i checked into my hostel my nose began its usual upturn at the state of the sheets in the dorm (which I shared with 3 boys who, I kid you not, STANK), and there was no glass in the window so the room was freezing. I decided to give it some time as I really couldn't be bothered to gather my stuff up again and go explain that I wanted my money back in my sign language.... I headed out into the town for a wonder and to get my bearings first of all which was uneventful (thankfully) and then back for a shower. It was here I realised that there were no shower curtains, no door on the bathroom (which was mixed sex) and no cold water. I stuck with it as I was in too deep before realising all of this. I managed a scoulding shower and a quick change before anyone came into the place! Both loos were blocked and there is no light in the cubicals, delightful huh. Wednesday - The following morning, looking through the smashed window screen of a red pickup truck I saw the Andean mountain range. What a wonderful sight. Corinna (sounds like the name of a hurricane) (a German woman from Switzerland), the driver and I headed into the mountains for a spot of trekking. The view from the truck alone made the small inconveniences of the s***ty hostel fade away. We had a great day, first a short hike up a mountain which the guide seemed to think would be taxing, I'm like "eerrrm, when you have done the Inca Trail, this is a piece of pi$$ my friend". Followed by a trek down to a point before abseiling the rest, which was brilliant!! We began our decent down what was more like a land slide than a path cut into the mountain. Our guide, who's nickname was "Chicken" was dressed in a FILA top and Addidas trackies, with Puma trainers on (not exactly technical mountain gear) made his way down the land slide first, setting off mini avelanches as he went, me next and then Corinna followed. The first abseil was only 20 foot then we did a 60 foot decent. I love abseiling, it was such a buzz. So I now want to be a Mountaineer OK. I wonder if Swindon College would run courses...... Once down we went to some hot springs for the afternoon, drank Cafe con Leche and bathed in the really hot water while looking up at the snow capped Andes. On the way back to the hostel, with the Andes behind us, we passed a small Swiss settlement which Corinna wanted to stop at in order to take a picture. I joked "bloody Swiss, they get everywhere" and it was a classic tumbleweed moment. ooppss-at this point I thought to myself "I crave someone who 'gets me'" you know... That night was the 'all you can eat buffet' extravaganza which I have already told you about and a good nights sleep was had, with only one random person shining a torch in my face that night.....? Thursday - At this point the true implications of the logistics of the hostel began to hit home. It goes like this: 1) Wake up and try to get out of bed without flashing my arse at anyone or thwacking my bonce on the top bunk and biting my tongue off at the same time (a challenge when the gap is less than a meter). 2) In the dark, collect stuff needed for shower being as quiet as possible. Collect valuables from your locker (as you can't leave anything for a moment, thieving bas&&rds), keys, pod, phone and clothes for the next day. 3) Open the sodding creaky door without pulling the handle off. 4) Shower in scalding water as quickly as possible before anyone walks in. 5) Dry as quickly as possible for the same reason. 6) Put undies on while trying to stay semi-covered with my towl. 7) Put stuff back in relevant places being careful with valuables and 2 sets of keys. 8) Dont dry hair as there are no power sockets. This particular morning I was at about point 6 when a guy walked in to use the loo. Anyway, I thought "surely he's not going to have a sit down with me stood right here?!" He did.....complete with farting and pushing noises. He finished and left without flushing or washing his hands. D.I.R.T.Y. B.*.*.*.A.R.D is all I am going to say. I watched the England game of course! and realised that some one had nicked my I-pod charger and USB cable. That "annoyed" me somewhat though I think it went when I was in Buenos Aires from my room there. That evening I sat chatting to a guy from Hong Kong about the problems in Tibet. He was telling me about how the Chinese government regularly lock up Radical Tibetans for campaigning for independence and how its illeagal for anyone to even hold a picture of the Dali Lama. I find it crazy to think that this level of supression (and more) still goes on. According to this guy, the Chinese government are corrupt to the extreme. Friday (was it?) Settling down to watch the Argentina game, there wasn't many people around. However, within about 10 mins the place was packed with fans. Flags, ticker tape (yes bags of it inside!), pop corn, shirts, rattles, whistles, drums, it was crazy. We all had our faces painted with the classic Blue and White stripes and well, you can imagine the erruption at a 6-0 win! Brilliant. i can still hear the "Si, Si, Si, Si" (going up in volume and tone), followed by a "Nooooooooo" (at the near misses). After the match I went to 2 wineries (yum) and a chocolate factory (double yum). Very nice on all counts me thinks. I tasted some different licours as well and bought a fabulous specialist, organic bottle of vodka (only to be drank straight of course), its lovely. I wonder how long it will last....? Saturday (Im guessing now) - In classic South America style, the bus was 30 mins late leaving. We drove an hour and half into the mountains again. We passed a total of 5 dead dogs on the side of the road. I occasionally glanced up at the driver who appeared to be nodding off from moment to moment so it was at that time I resigned myself (again) to "death by mini bus" and concentrated on the wonderful sight that was in my eye line of the snow capped mountains. On the way to our destination the bus was pulled over by the millitary. A gaurd of some description stormed on the bus and shouted at us to declare our nationalities and then stomped off. "ooooo, handbag". The area felt strangly sureal and rather "hill billy" like. I could here that Deliverance tune in my head. Later, I was handed a wet suit that I was supposed to peel on and some trousers, a top and a helmet. I wondered off to the lavs, chuckling to myself about how was going to get this bloody thing on. Anyway, I peeled it on and realised that is had no arse in it!!! Seriously, a big hole right over the butt (theres that banjo tune again). I laughed to myself and thought "nevermind, I have trousers to put over the top, I'll just get a cold butt". I put the trousers on to find that they to, had a hole over each butt cheek (are you liking the pitcure I am now painting?). "ok, this is too much" I thought, "how the flip are you going to get around this one Amy?" I shuffled out, pulling my top over my butt and decided that my sign language would have to once again, come into play. I went up to the guy, started laughing and turned around and pointed at my butt. He nearly fell over from laughing so hard! I thought "yeah alright mate it's not that funny" (but of course it was). He gave me another pair of trousers and I was set. All that said, I then went White Water Rafting which was brilliant! Albeit bloody freezing water which would apparently send you Hyperthermic in 8 mins, so i tried to stay out of it. Listening to the instructions as we went through the rapids was rather amusing though as they were all in Spanish! I just copied the guy in front of me. My poor trainers were sopping but it was a fab experience. In the afternoon I went mountain biking in the Andes which was equally fabulous. However, the bike was a rickety old piece of crap with zero travel and a disconneted front break incase of mishaps and handlebar tumbles. The guide started to tell me about positioning on the bike as I rode off to test the gears and do a skid in the car park. I think he realised I could ride a bike at that point. It was a great day. Sunday - With food bags in my trainers and following a one hour van journey up a dirt track into the mountains, we reached a classic old ranch which held nothing more than a pen of cows, horses and some rather strange looking dogs. Three real Goucho's (cowboys) arrived with several manky looking horses in toe. They were rearing, snorting and generally mis-behaving....the horses seemed fine though ha ha. Anyway, at this stage I thought "oh F$$K" I can't ride a horse and I started to quake a little. Once again, in true South American styley all Health and Safety regulations went out the window. No proper saddles, just sheepskin, no hats, no proper stirrups, just some bent in tin cans and no information about horse riding. I grabbed the sheepskin, wedged my foot into the tin can, took a deep breath and said "come on then big boy" (as only I can). I clambered on. He never moved thank god. The gouchos shouted something and jumped on their horses, which reared up and they were off. Not before one of them honked up a load of goo and gobbed it out, I swear I heard a tin "ping" sound. So there I am, sat on this horse, brikin' it frankly. I kicked the horse rather pathetically (and then apologised) and made a stupid clicking sound with my mouth and he didn't move. One of the gouchos came galloping over and belted him on the arse with a leather thing and my horse (who I had named "poor ba&&ard" by now) shot into action. oh no, not just a plod along to help this little tourist get her kicks, but a full on gallop! Well I think that is what you call it. When your butt leaves the horses back and hurts like hell when you hit it again (Elliott, Im sure you know what I'm talking about)! So picture it, the sillohette of me on the horse, as it gallops in to the sunset and I scream "arrrrhhhhh" looking like a rag doll on its back. MOTHER OF GOD! Eventually Poor Ba$$ard slows, as does my heart rate. We stop for a drink half way through and all the horses poo, I mean all of them, in unison. It reaks but you can't help but have a look, know what I mean....or is that just me? We returned to the ranch through lots of steep ups and downs, single track terrain, surrounded by razor sharp bushes and cacti. Funnily enough I left my jophers and riding boots at home that day and instead, wore my 3/4 length North Face trousers and my minging trainers (complete with food bags to keep my feet dry). I now have razor cuts to my shins and calfs to match my lushous traveller look. Once at the ranch I pretty much fell off the horse but did so in the wrong place. I was surrounded my horses arses (I was strangely reminded of a Nationwide Project Team meeing) ha ha (joke). I swiftly moved through fear of being kicked (that'll be another project meeting then! ha) and then found myself surrounded by a load of big fat pigs, no it wasn't Fat Fighters, Marjorie Dawes wasn't in sight (nice piece of cake and some dust!). The whole thing was most strange. Monday - Was a simple 3 hour bike ride without event, I am pleased to say. So in all I have done exactly what I came to Mendoza to do, Trek, Abseil, Horseride, Mountain bike and White Water raft. How great is that. I'm pleased to say that I am in a perminant state of excitement these days, I wish I could share some of it with you guys though. Tomorrow is packing, washing, ENG-ER-LAND! and shopping. I fly to Easter Island early on Wednesday. Until then Mi Amigos. Choose to live "Happily ever now" xxxx