Don’t tell my mother, but I am lucky to be alive. Halong Bay did not start out well. The four hours that it took to get there were pure hell on earth, made even worse by our drivers kamikaze approach to driving the minibus. After the first hour, I stopped counting the near miss high speed collisions and just closed my eyes and prayed. We did all make it eventually, but before I get to Halong Bay…..

Here are a few more examples of my continued culture shock:

#1 There were people selling bread on the side of the highway. Just chillin’ on the shoulder with their baked goods. Considering we spent most of the drive out to the bay on the shoulder of the highway, I feared for them and their bread. But alright, people selling bread on the highway. That’s cool, I guess.

#2 There were water buffalo on the highway. Water buffalo!!! Every now and again our driver slammed on the breaks to avoid a collision with one. I think that they are the Vietnamese version of the cow, but it still begs the question, what are they doing on a highway?

#3 Two words. Seaweed Pringles. (Swear to god, I have photographic proof.)

Anyhow….finally, finally, finally we arrived at Halong Bay. A bay sandwiched between the Gulf of Tonkin and the China Sea where almost 2000 limestone islands rise spectacularly from the emerald sea. Pictures will not do this place justice and my descriptions will inevitably fall short, so you will just have to take my word for it. It was absolutely astonishing.

We boarded our boat (they call it a Chinese Junk Boat), checked into our cabins, and met our fellow passengers. First, my room. I HAVE A REAL BATHROOM WITH A SHOWER AGAIN!!! NO MORE SHOWER/TUB COMBO!!! I was pretty excited about this fact. It will likely be the nicest bathroom I have for the entire trip. Onto my fellow passengers. There were only nine of us total on the boat, and four of the nine only spoke French. As you may recall from my last entry, I do not. So I was left with an English couple and an Aussie couple (I was the lone American). I bonded immediately with Rick and Christine who were on holiday from York, England. We swapped previous travel stories over welcome cocktails. The day was definitely looking up.

We sailed out into the bay and our first stop was TiTop island. When we docked, some of the group sat on the beach and relaxed while Rick taunted me into climbing the 427 steps to the lookout point on top of the island. We climbed and climbed. Making the climb with us were about five hundred Korean tourists. How did I know they were Korean? Well the fact that they were all wearing the same neon green shirt with a big Korean flag on it kind of gave them away. None the less, the views from the top were worth the climb.

Back on the boat they asked us who wanted to go kayaking. Rick and I decided to share a kayak as his wife was having no part of it. We ended up being the only two who wanted to go. So off we went. We paddled (poorly) after the guide and bonded over our mutual love for Alan Rickman and John Malkovich. Gliding through the lovely green water of Halong Bay all I could do was marvel at what was around me. It. Was. Amazing. The sun was just starting to set and the water was calm and quiet. We paddled through small caves and lagoons, just staring in awe at where we were. It was so freaking beautiful, and I kept thinking to myself - I cannot believe that I am actually here. It was, by far, one of the coolest things that I have ever done.

Now, our guide didn’t speak much English, but would occasionally yell a direction or order at us (ie. “you going wrong way” or “no straight, straight” - we had difficulty at first figuring out how to steer). At one point we were headed for a cave and this interaction occurred:
Guide: “you paddle slow!”
Me: “okay….why?”
Guide: “cuz of crocodiles.”
Me: “say what now…”
Guide grins cheekily and paddles away. Jerk. I think he was messing with me. I don’t like being messed with.

After returning to the boat and having some dinner and refreshments, some of the guys in the group went squid fishing, while I went up to the top deck to read my book and drink a glass of wine under the stars. Perfection.

The next morning I got up and went to the top deck to watch the sunrise. And although no one else in the group believed me, it was worth getting up for. We had breakfast and sailed over to the largest cave in the bay, Sung Sot or Surprise Cave. Now listen...having lived fairly close to the Shenandoah Valley, home to the amazing Luray Caverns as well as countless others, I was prepared to be unimpressed....despite my absolute adoration of caves. I should not have been concerned. Our guide said that the entire cave was 10,000 square meters. I have no idea how big that actually is (sounds big though). But I have never seen anything like this cave. I was in heaven.

Sailing back to shore, our journey was complete. I will say it again, the photos will not do Halong Bay justice. It was jaw droppingly fantastic. And so Halong Bay will now join Machu Picchu as one of the favorite places I have ever visited. If you are ever given the opportunity, do not hesitate, just go.

Vietnam Vital Signs (still so far):
Mosquito bites: now too numerous to count…oh well
Pizzas consumed: shockingly still 0
Fruit slushies consumed: 7
Number of times I almost died getting to Halong Bay: 126 (I think)
Number of times I uttered "this is amazing" once I got to Halong Bay: 759 (worth it)