Singapore
A five and a half hour flight to Singapore, coupled with two hours of added time meant we arrived at 7.30am. With a bout of elephantitis. Not in the good areas...
Got a shuttle bus to the Travellers Inn (popular name) where we were 4 HOURS early for check in. Luckily we could leave our bags there until our room was ready. Unluckily, we had to find something to do.
So, in the same clothes we had been wearing for what felt like two days, we headed off , completely exhausted, to waste some time.
Now, the first thing you notice about Singapore is how clean and calm everything is. A complete contrast to India. They even wait for the 'little green man' before crossing the road. The fools.
The second thing is the weather, extremely humid and the sun is powerful, even early in the morning. The helpful owner gave us a map and sent us on our way.
Zombified, we shuffled to the nearest park to slump to the ground and sleep. All that was missing was Special Brew, a dog and a Tourette's like bark of 'change for food'? The sway, stench and heavy, sweaty clothes were already ours. We felt like tramps but it was good. Like Bill the Tramp.
Coming from India it was a nice change of culture....except we'd booked our stay in a part of town called...Little India. Ridiculous.
This coupled with our near deliriousness made me feel like I'd been spiked and assaulted. In the mind.
On our way back we saw an Indian ceremony where men walk the streets in a torture-like contraption that pierces the tongue and body. Maybe it's supposed to represent marriage? Could have quite easily been a mirage. It all kept getting weirder.
We finally got the chance to check in and freshen up (minus the aftershave-wielding, lollipop-pushing fellow).
The room was tiny with a bunk bed, shower and not much else.
My old room at my mums was affectionately known as Harry Potters Cupboard Under the Stairs, so for me it was a treat.
Batteries fully charged we decided to visit the Singapore Night Zoo. A fellow traveller overheard this and questioned whether it would be good, saying 'think it might be touristy'. Err...yeah, it's a Zoo. I think that's fairly unavoidable. An un-touristy Zoo is called the wild you Schmuck. Off to the night Zoo we went, taking the bus all the way. Guess who was also on the bus? Yes, uncle Schmuck. We tried to avoid him like a child playing hide and seek, who just stands in the same spot covering his face with his hand. It didn't work very well and we got cornered. He decided it'd be a good idea for us to see the Zoo together. I decided this was going to be an error and initiated the tactic of asking him what he wanted to see and then saying the complete opposite. Sounds harsh, but it was the only way to avoid the situation other than pointing to the sky and running.
Annoying man aside, the Zoo was really good. You can either walk through, catch a tram
or do a bit of both, like we did. Personal favourites were the Snow Leopards, Sloth Bears and Flying Squirells.
On the way back, somehow, we ran out of luck and bumped into Schmuck, who we ended up in a cab with. God knows.
The next day we caught a train (which are excellent) to explore the city. Went through a shopping mall, which was extremely clean, large and shiny.
We then headed through the city over the Helix Bridge, a long chain of twisting metal over the river, leading to two art museums, views of the city and a floating football pitch (my personal favourite). This is, however, eclipsed by the Marina Bay Hotel. A skyscraper with, what appears to be, a boat on top. After visiting one of the museums/galleries we agreed this should be our next destination.
The museum we chose was all about the Titanic, leaving Alex in her element. The only thing missing was Leo. I suppose a girl can dream.
With no irony lost, we headed from one spectacular boat to another.
In order to visit the 'boat' area - The SkyPark - we had to walk through the mall, train station and casino, all situated in the hotel. We finally reached the amusement-park-type desk, bought a ticket and went 57 floors to the top. The view is amazing. On one side you can see the whole of the city and the other you can see the sea. If you are a guest at the hotel there is an infinity pool. The b******s. We, on the other hand, had an £18 Coke (alcohol in Singapore is even more extortionate) at the 'Skybar' and took in the view.
This had all really eaten away at our very limited time and the race was on to get to Raffles Hotel for a Singapore Sling and, the thing I had been craving for all day...TEA AND CAKE! We power walked to the station, bought our tickets and waited 10 minutes for a train. Time was ticking fast but I was sure we could make it. Using my crack-like sugar addiction as blind determination, we got off the train and headed for Raffles. Predictably, we couldn't find it. No-one we asked knew where it was. How do you not know where it is, for Allah's sake......?
We had got off at the wrong stop. It was too late and my sugar-coated dream had died.
Oh, well, maybe Chiang Mai do cream tea....no, me neither.