I made a slight error as we sat down opposite some Brits. The lady opposite was showing her neighbour something on her phone. She explained that it was an old phone, specifically not a smart phone. I chipped in, unsolicited and explained to her how my friend categorized phones into two groups, "smart" phones and "idiot" phones. I thought I'd delivered it in a jocular enough way, but her reaction didn't suggest this and as I dug a hole by saying "its the phone, not the person", matters seemed to get worse, judging by her expression. I tried a couple of times to resurrect our pointless and dying relationship, but it was absolutely dead. As we continued on towards our volcanic destination, I thought of that old aphorism "if you drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let 'em go, because, man, they're gone".