Tell me lies tell me sweet little lies/ walking on walking on Broken glass

27th-30th December

Road Trip: Freeway, Morro Bay, Big Sur, San Francisco baby yeah

Road trips: sound awesome, are awesome but require planning...Not a planner.

Doug (the van) legend of the road, automatic (naturally); the speed which we adapted to right road driving was rather impressive... Shame we didn't adapt to driving such a beast.

The first major stretch, LA to the middle of nowhere (5hr stint) was all very exciting, 'I'm on the freeway' 'I'm driving in America' hello Cher and Dion.

The sat nav broke pretty much from the word go and being old school Doug did not have built in wifi. Leaving us reliant on moi's driving skills and the directional reading of Capt. CB.... Imagine Fods's reaction to this... Oh wait she fell asleep... Because that's how soothing the drive was. Pretty sure our Callum (stowaway aus) was s***ting bricks but he managed to hold it together man of The van and all.

Determined to keep it a povo journey (epic fail) the cheeky b*****s that we are spent the night behind a gas station; accidentally (on purposely )sending the two bigger breasted members of Doug to request the pleasure of the Carpark from the enigmatic Mexicano attendant.
Doug; containing a sink, a table, fold out double bed and the four us cosied up, was quite the comfortable abode.

A good 8hours sleep and refreshing baby wipe wash in the toilet later, a few more 100 miles were burned to Morro Bay, entrance to the Big Sur and a quaint little town.

Morro Bay has a pier and a half an hour stroll, which basically covers the length of the town. There's a random giant rock just off the coast and lots of seaside shop a prettier Whitby if you will... However they had limited Fro-yo opportunities much to Capt. CB'a dismay and our annoyance...as she requested one... Repeatedly!

Leaving Morro Bay, the next drive through 'the Big Sur' took about 6 hours, basically the Big Sur s***s all over the Coranmandel (NZ, sorry G) The roads twist up mountains, curve round the coastline and the scenery is slam your brakes on and jump out of Doug stunning!! Next to you is the sea, sky, casual zebras, giant sea lions and occasional burst of a whale!! Never ending fairytale.

We sang... A lot...hope you enjoyed your snapchats. Callum was introduced to a whole new world of Sheffield, Whitney and banter. The resurrection of Drive time made the journey what it was. If your doing this drive you wish I could be your DJ.

By sunset we were still 4 hours away from the San of Fran. Drive got pretty heavy at this point, the driving being split between me and Fods left little room for concentration lapses... Until one of crashed into a pole.... And nope it wasn't me. ;)

Stopping in a downbeat American town.. Generic...forgettable... Possibly rough....We trawled the cold cold street for food...luckily for us there was a wide selection of oh so healthy Mexican, Chinese banquet, fried chicken... Mexican again then.

Slightly revived from the grease and stodge, we soldiered on. Through to San Jose, do you know the way?Prettily decorated it had an actual Christmas market (post Xmas) fairy light (everyone loves a pretty light) and if we weren't on a schedule it would have been a bed down and explore kinda place.

The glorious destinatation of San Fran was reached at 10pm... And honestly glorious was not the word! depositing Callum at his city centre hostel, crowds, dirty streets, hobos surrounded us: on a one way road system. Not impressed.

One (actual) man down the wolf pack were a little lost. Deciding everything would be better in the light of day we took a chance an empty Carpark, under a railway bridge...next to a derelict estate... As a place of safety.
Sounds shady possibly was shady.

We alfresoed toileted... (Good breeding) locked the doors and bedded down...for the comforting honk of the train... Every hour... On the hour.
Semi decent sleep later, it appeared we'd dumped ourselves on a park and ride... Doug squatted between audi's, Jeeps etc quite the standout and put a stop to any ideas of alfresco toileting.

The morning of the 29th: possibly our darkest hour. Tense, sleep deprived, lost and unwashed you did not want to mess with us...no wifi meant no way to google out way out of this hole. Putting our faith in a sat nav (which had failed to shine yet) we headed to the 'lodgings' it suggested.

The Chinese keepers of Golden Gate park got a rude awakening; Golden gate park does not 'lodge' but it did have a staff toilet... Which we assaulted. Before heading off to Macca's to join the hobos (they beg food we begged wifi). Lesson learnt never trust a sat nav.

Logic (in the shape of fods) dictated a shower would make this all better, the greatest idea of public swimming baths would have been fabulous should it not have been closed for Xmas holidays! Now me and Capt CB are pretty adaptable and 2 days without a shower is more than bearable and Kudos to Fods that she got down and dirty with us for a 2nd day of Babywipe freshness... With my new (birthday) foxy hat ready we headed off to explore the Francisco of San.

Top 5 tours of San Fran as agreed by our electic mix:

1:Golden Gate Bridge: a stunning feat of construction, it's gi-mor-mous its red (all things associated with Red are fabulous) walk over it, feel the sway, marvel at the scenery and question the lack of barrier and free phone crisis helpline positioned on the middle.

2:Sausalito: the bay at the otherside, a posh town of loveliness, walks and my lost hat (yep 5 hours I had it).... You would retire there if half the place wasn't in darkness by midday and the ferry carried on past 5. Oh and it will always be the place Capt CB lost her fro yo virginity... Trust me it was a big deal!

3: Alcatraz: we couldn't go to it, (booked up) but we went around it... On a ferry... Looked like Azkabam...excellent feedback from everyone that's been... Gutted.

4: Pier 39; busy, touristy, American dream being the cool Katz we are matching I ❤️SF shirts were in order. Whilst we sat at an American bar... Watching basketball... With a bud. So very new girl.

5: Lombard street/ Mrs Doubtfires house. The advert with the bouncy balls.. Yeah we went there.. At night... Then accidentally walked the length of it the next day... And very nearly caught the tram back up it...it's a street but imagine the advert and you get it.

Sneaky number 6: Obama campaigners apartment. Randomly met this hair twirling campaigner and his right hand lawyer in a bar. They took us in a über taxi, they took us for sliders and taught us blackjack for winners. They offered us a shower...

Which we accepted. Shower from a strange man...sure... Just met him a bar... Sure...Best shower ever.

This awesome dude Even provided us with bacon muffins and chai lattes whilst playing fleetwood Mac; on a record player, on the flat roofed apartment... It couldn't be more yank sitcom if you tried... Adored every minute. Well apart from the bit when the lawyer trashed me.. Repeatedly with sarcastic wit, intelligence and education that I can only dream of and I'm sure Fods and Capt will never let me forget!

By day 2 San Fran had truely intoxicated all 3 us (with minimal alcohol consumption) you want to live here... Forever. Showered, fed and watered we graced Golden Gate park with a four hour stroll and singing session (only fair after out toilet antics). We sang, held hands. Saw art and Bisen, avoided death by falling tree, got wind whooped on the sea front and enjoyed some actual green space. Beautiful place, happy people.

Callum was missing us after a day apart so we headed to meet him for a clam chowder lunch (American dream) and a San Fran tram ride. Unfortunately the cold city Delivered with our SF tshirts offering little protection and an hours wait for the tram, we decided a regular bus back to Doug was good enough for us.

Next leg of the Road trip is Vegas baby...approximately 8 hours away... A night time mission we are prepared for...I think...

San Fran has been addictive, compulsive, adorable, liveable, intoxicating and not long enough!!
A return visit needs to happen.

See you in Vegas baby!

Loves

S xxxxx