I've been given the lovely task of writing about Hanoi since Bryan only likes to write nice things and so he has little to write about for Hanoi!

After the all the traffic madness of Saigon we were dreading what Hanoi might be like, assuming it would be worse since it's the capital city. Although it was still crazy by most people's standards, it wasn't quite as bad as Saigon. Having said that, I was still petrified of crossing the road and pretty much had to just let Bryan drag me across. But by the end of our stay we actually had locals following our lead for crossing rather than the other way around!

As we've mentioned before, our stay in Hanoi was broken up and we actually went there 3 times. Just to make it clear this isn't because we liked it so much but more because it was just necessary to do it that way if we wanted to see Halong Bay and Sapa. So first things first, sorting out our Chinese visa was an urgent priority. I'm sure you have all been on the edge of your seats to find out how our visa crisis has ended. Well let me reassure you that I am actually writing this blog from Shanghai so it all worked out. Despite reading online that it is impossible to get a China visa in Hanoi, our hotel actually did it and for a comparatively reasonable price of $55 each.

With that weight sort of off our shoulders (I still couldn't believe it was that easy and was dubious right up until we got through the airport in Beijing) we could concentrate on doing a bit of sightseeing in the capital city. We're not big fans of museums but I quite liked the sound of the Museum of Ethnology which was inconveniently located 16km out of town. As we are watching the pennies we decided to take a local bus and Lonely Planet told us which bus we needed to take so we got on it. The bus driver spoke no English but we showed him on the map where we wanted to go in the hope that he would tell us when to get off. He did not and we missed our stop which meant a long walk in the heat to the museum. It was quite informative about all the different tribes that reside in Vietnam but it was a bit of information overload and took hours to walk around the museum (which had no AC). When we thought we had finished we realised there was loads more outside which included life-sized example tribes houses which you could go inside and physically see how the tribes live. This was far more interesting than the indoor part but unfortunately a massive thunderstorm started and we had to take shelter in one of these houses. The museum closed before the downpour stopped so we sheltered just outside waiting for it to stop before trekking to our bus stop. However, it didn't stop and the single taxi driver outside the museum took advantage of this and offered us an extremely high price to go back to town and told us the buses had stopped. We decided not to take his word for it and ran to the bus stop. We found our bus but it was the other side of the now flooded road so we had to wade across to it. The AC on the bus together with us being soaked to the bone was not a good combination and I wanted nothing more than to get back to the hotel and have a hot shower. However, the journey that took us 20 minutes on the way out took us 2 an a half hours on the way back...and we didn't even get back! The traffic was horrendous and just came to a standstill. The bus driver eventually decided he wasn't waiting around and crossed over to the other side and started driving the wrong way down the road! At some point this traffic also came to a standstill. I looked over to the other side of the road and realised that most of the buses and cars had been abandoned like the start of some sort of zombie film! Our bus driver then got out. When he didn't return after 5 minutes we decided since we were only a couple of miles away we would just walk. It was quite surreal walking down the road weaving in and out of bumper to bumper stationary vehicles, even the motorcycles couldn't move anywhere. It was still raining very hard but we hadn't dried off yet so how much worse could it get? Much worse apparently. We soon found the source of the traffic problems. Just slightly further down the road it was completely and utterly flooded. We were wading knee deep in filthy water and goodness knows what was in it. I may have mentioned before that people here litter chronically. Everything gets thrown onto the street regardless of what it is. Put that together with the fact that their sewage system is so terribly poor that if you put a piece of toilet paper down the toilet the whole system blocks up, I was totally grossed out by the thought of what I might be wading through in my flip flops and what things were getting wrapped around my ankles. It was also really difficult because it was flowing quite fast and you couldn't see the pavements or broken paving slabs so I kept tripping over things (luckily I didn't fall over). It was a long walk back and we were meant to be sorting out train tickets that evening but everywhere was closed by that time. Anyway, we eventually got back to our hotel a little worse for wear and had a nice hot shower. Of course it stopped raining almost the moment we got back!

Sorting out train tickets in Hanoi was tricky. Back in Saigon our hotel had done it for us for a couple of extra dollars which is probably what it would have cost us to take a taxi to the train station to get them anyway. However in Hanoi all the hotels and travel agents (usually they are one and the same thing) seem to have a pact going to charge ridiculous prices to sort out train tickets. The train station was within walking distance from where we were staying so we thought we'd do it ourselves. Of course that would have been too easy. The first time we went there it was closed. For some odd reason it only opens late at night. When we went back we queued up only to find the woman's computer stopped working when we got to the front. She moved to the next computer along and told us to go there but before we got there a vietnamese woman pushed in front and she started serving her first! No one queues like the British! When she eventually served us we wrote down the dates and train numbers and she told us they were full. We gave her a few other train numbers and she said they were all full without even looking them up. She was so unhelpful and rude as well. This left us no choice but to go to travel agents who all charged silly prices but they had tickets available! My theory is that they pay the train station to refuse to sell to tourists so the travel agents make more profit. After all the hassle we ended up getting tickets through our hotel anyway.

Ok so I must have something nice to say about Hanoi right? Well it wasn't all bad. It's actually quite a nice looking city. We stayed in the old quarter which is exactly how you would want it to be. Old fashioned shops with people sitting on street corners playing cards and eating noodles. One thing that was quite cool is that each street sells one individual thing and is named after it. For example, you have silk street which is a street full of silk shops, or a street full of baby clothes, there's even a mannequin street! There is a nice lake nearby which has a little island in the middle of it with a temple that we visited.

During our final stint in Hanoi we decided to stay at a homestay to try to experience a bit more of local life. I'm not sure how well that really worked out but at least we tried. There were a couple of other people staying there who were interesting people so it was alright just not the experience we were hoping for. One evening, Mike the owner of the homestay, suggested we all go for a local meal to try some street food. I told him I don't eat pork before he'd decided where to go to eat and he said that was no problem. We got the restaurant and it was a Vietnamese style hotpot - basically like a fondue/DIY soup where you put meat and fish into a communal broth to cook. However, this turned out to be pork stock and he just said "You're travelling so you have to try new things." I'm not averse to trying new things but I don't think he really understood the fact that because it's a religious thing you can't just decide to forget about it. It's not like I was just being fussy for the sake of it. It was pure torture sitting there watching everyone tuck into their meals and because you have to wait for the food to cook we were there for hours! It turned out to be a bit of a blessing in disguise because it cost a small fortune. It was twice as much as what we've been paying in proper restaurants and this was street food. Since there were a lot of his friends there I think we were paying for their share too. He even initially asked to take payment from me also but we corrected him! Afterwards Bryan and I went to a local fast food place to get a chicken burger as I was starving and they told me to sit down and they'd bring it to me. 30 minutes later nothing arrived and they'd completely forgotten about me. Not a great night for food!

Our last day in Vietnam we decided to go to see the Ho Chi Minh Mausoleum. This guy is basically the idol of communist Vietnam and his picture is everywhere. Despite his wishes to be cremated when he died, the government decided to preserve his body so that people could be reminded of him. Of course the day we went to go and see him the place was closed for maintenance! Oh well, who wants to see a dead body anyway?! The surrounding area was quite cool though and seriously heavily guarded. We accidentally stepped over a no entry line and one of the guards went crazy with his whistle until we realised and stepped away! Whilst wandering away from the Mauseleum back into town I saw an old Vietnamese woman coming towards us holding up a flip flop. I thought she was trying to sell us flip flops so I did the standard gesture for no thanks that we're so used to doing by now. She walked past us like normal but next thing we know she whacked Bryan on the arm with her flip flop! She did it quite hard and it left a huge red mark on his arm! We were absolutely stunned and not quite sure what to do so Bryan laughed it off and just carried on walking. Suddenly there's a whack on my shoulder and she's chucked her flip flop right at me! I saw red by this point and yelled at her asking her what her problem was in slightly colourful language. She was just muttering stuff in Vietnamese. It took all of my willpower not to retaliate and just to walk away. A nearby security guard had popped his head round to see what the noise was about and I guessed if there was some kind of trouble they probably wouldn't be on our side so it wouldn't be worth it. We still have literally no idea what her problem was and can only guess perhaps she thought we were American. By this point I was glad it was our last day in Vietnam. We have found the people in northern Vietnam to be dishonest and unlikeable which is unfortunate because the north is so beautiful. After having to miss out some much of Vietnam due to our tight schedule I thought maybe we could go back in the future but our experiences with the northerners has put me off.

So that marks not only the end of Vietnam but the end of South East Asia and we are almost halfway through our travels which is a scary thought. Overall we've had some incredible experiences so far and SE Asia is really a fascinating place. It's a shame that our last few days left a sour taste in our mouths but regardless of that I think after 3 months of "same same but different" (a phrase they like to use everywhere here) we're ready to leave SE Asia and begin the next chapter of our adventure.