When we touched down into Sydney we were greeted with an unexpected chaos which would come from trying to get to our hostel.When we walked out into the sun from Sydney international we only had a very rough idea of how to get into the city and to our hostel.Before we knew it though a mini van pulled up and the driver shouted to get in as he was double parked.Apparently all the hostel mini vans ran from the domestic terminal.

At the domestic terminal we transferred to another bus where we were counted off.It appeared that they had accounted for us in their numbers.Since we hadn't booked ahead it meant someone else had not turned up or was late so their loss was our gain.This van driver tore around the city like you wouldn't believe dropping people off at their hostels until we eventually arrived at Chilli Blue.

There we were greeted by possibly one of the most miserable looking men I have ever met.He turned out to be the owner but luckily we would not see too much of him as the desk was normally manned by an Asian guy or his very pregnant wife, both of whom were very helpful and good fun.

When we got to the room there was no sign of Marco but an Irish guy in there called Jack said he had left.More worrying was the guy at the desk had no record of him.There was nothing we could do about it so I emailed him and then we went straight to the botanic gardens and after checking out a few weird trees and the fruit bats we promptly went to sleep in the sun in order to recharge for the night ahead.

Recharged and back at the room we found Marco.They were so well organised that they had him booked in under my name so I was there twice.That first night the whole hostel went out in a bus to a club called the Gaff.With us we also had Jess who we met in Miami, as well as Suzanne from home and her boyfriend Scott (fantastic guy, please come back to England!).They are living in Sydney at the moment.

Every night the entertainment manager had sorted the hostel out with free entry and free drinks to a different place so there was always somewhere to go.Throughout our time in Sydney we would go to The Gaff, Scary Cannery and World Bar.The trick is to start with "Goon" which is an exceptionally cheap wine bought by the 4 litre box for $10 which is pretty good once its shared out.It can also be stored open at room temperature for 5 days and still drunk so I am not sure what exactly is in it.I don't think I want to know.

Our room so took on the status of party room once Imo and Olliwho were from Germany arrived.We would normally cram about 15 into our small dorm and play drinking games until it was time to go out.

Imo and Olli were great fun and always game for anything.I am starting to wonder where the Germans got the stereotype of being sensible and straight laced from.Another guy from the room was Kevin from New Caledonia.He had only ever smoked pot before he came travelling to Australia and as such struggled to keep up.He could normally be found wandering around lost at about 730pm already wasted from a couple of glasses of wine.He would constantly and needlessly apologise for his poor English which I didn't think was that bad. Once as a joke suggested he spoke to me in French so he could see how bad I was he stuttered a bit then swore loudly saying he was so drunk he had forgotten how to speak French.

Without a doubt though the funniest guy in the room was Jack the Irish guy we met on the morning.By day he was calm, cool and collected.By night he was a nightmare but so worth going out with.If timed right you could go out and have fun with him and then leave before he started any fights.One night in particular stands out in my mind.We had all gone to Scarys and I had left a bit early.When I saw him and one of his friends the next day his friend had a rather squashed blue and purple nose.Jack had been harassing the girls to much so when a bouncer had tried to remove him he had kicked up a bit of a fuss.His friend stepped in and actually punched the bouncer to the ground resulting in a bit of a roughing up for them.This sort of thing seemed to happen around Jack quite a bit.

Another of Jacks skills, which of course I do not condone, was stealing.As he had no money left and was yet to secure a job he would watch people buy pints then follow waiting for them to put the pint down before striking at the right moment.He would have himself a fresh almost full drink.Jack also liked to pick up clothes left lying around pubs and bars.He gave me a very nice hoody once that he had picked up.I didn't know where he had picked it up from so to keep him happy I put it on and was going to hand it in to a bouncer as I left.10 minutes later a guy came up and asked if it was his.He turned out to be pretty grateful that I had found it on the floor and looked after it…

The last thing that needs to be known about Jack is that you should never try to go to bed before him.It doesn't matter what time he gets in, even at 5 or 6am, even if you are not alone in bed, he will still wake you up to talk and occasionally demand you get out of bed to wrestle him.If you don't he starts removing the contents of your bag and throwing them around the room until you comply with his demands.He is quite persuasive.Whilst I of course do not condone any of the above behaviour (apart from wrestling, that's fun) no one could help but like Jack.Apart from maybe the final guest of room 14.

Sonja from Germany had just arrived in Australia and was going to use her working visa to travel for a year.Since she had got a job in catering she had to be up at 5am.I don't think she enjoyed being part of room 14 as much as we did.

Aside from all the going out and partying in Sydney, something that appears to be the only reason backpackers come here, there were some pretty cool things to do in the day as well.

After we had been in Sydney a couple of days and had time to wander around a bit Marco, who had by now purchased a Ford Falcon with a stonking 4L V6 engine, suggested a small road trip. So after picking up another friend he had made,Kal Los we headed for the Blue Mountains which turned out not to be blue at all, at least not where we were.

After checking out a view of the huge valleys by the Three Sisters we went to try to find somewhere we could camp for free.After driving for miles into the wilderness along dirt roads we decided we would have to pull over to eat or it would be dark before we got the chance.We set up on the side of the dirt track and cooked a feast of steak, sausages as well as a really good salad all washed down with goon, all in the middle of the wilderness.

After we had finished eating we decided we must have been going the wrong way so turned around driving back for miles before seeing some signs and turning back again.Turned out that where we had eaten was one bend before the campsite.

The place was completely empty so we set about putting up the tents wherever we wanted.Marco was going to sleep in his car and Kal Los was going to use Marco's one man tent.The car he had bought did come with a 3 person tent so Olli and I took that.Unfortunately Marco had not checked the tent before and it turned out not only to be pegless but also one of the poles was broken.As luck would have it I had some tape with which we were able to at least rejoin the broken pole with.Then instead of pegging the guy lines to hold the tent down we tied them up into a tree to hold the tent up.

If you think we had been badly prepared in terms of the tent you should have seen what we had brought for sleeping.We had one small blanket each and nothing to sleep on.Now wherever I put my head down I can sleep and I have slept on hard ground for one reason or another before. The problem was that it was only 4c outside.By the end of the night we had emptied all the clothes out of our rucksack "no homo barrier" and were still cold.The next morning Kal Los commented on the large animal he had heard a number of times running around the campsite in the night.it had of course been Olli running around trying to get warm.

The next morning we headed back to the three sisters and then trekked down the mountain into the valley.It took over half an hour to get down all the steps so we were not looking forward to heading back up.We trekked for a couple of hours in the forest seeing a couple of really amazing waterfalls.We had to turn back in time to get back to the car before the parking ran out but I wanted to climb higher up one of the falls first.Never mind though I thought I would just go further then job to catch up.Big mistake.

By the time I got back to the staircase I could hardly take another step but all the way up whenever I asked anyone they said they had seen the group of three I had described and they were only a little further up.By the time I caught them up I was not sure whether I was going to be sick or pass out.Perhaps both.None the less I got up quicker then I went down so I was pretty chuffed.

After taking on some food and water we headed back for the hostel.It is at this point perhaps worth mentioning that this was the first time I had properly experienced Australian drivers.Not only are they insanely reckless but don't seem to be able to drive properly either.It was at times terrifying, especially the truckers.

When we got back into Sydney we tried to book back into Chilli Blue but the dorms were full.Fortunately they had a 3 person private room which the kind Chinese lady let us have for the same price as a normal dorm.This however was still a bit expensive for me considering I only slept in it once in four nights instead ending up in all sorts of places including room 14 again, much to Jacks delight.

During that week we explored more of the city of course going to the Opera House as well. We also saw a fair bit more of Suzanne and Scott.Scott is one of the nicest people I have ever met and is always up for a laugh even if they were both pissed off about the new place they had moved into.It was so mouldy it was making them ill so were now trying to find another place.The second move in one month.

We had been planning on going to Canberra to get out Visa for china but when I had been idly chatting with the guy on the front desk he said he thought there was a visa centre in Sydney and found one for us next to Hyde park.We went there and arranged to meet Suzanne afterwards.We were in and out far quicker then expected.This was partly due to me having none of the required documentation.Whilst I had my passport I did not have proof of my onwards journey from China, I did not have my Australian Esta (I did this online months ago) and I still did not have my driving license so no second form of ID.Still the lady was very helpful and told me what I needed to declare about my travel plans in the "anything to declare section" which would hopefully mean I could still get my Visa.Naturally we used our new found time to chuck the disc around in the park.

Once we had met up with Suzanne we headed down towards the docks to try to locate Philips Foot, a restaurant which my uncle, also called Philip, had recommended.You get all you can eat salad and bread with whatever type of huge steak you like.You then take the steak to the BBQ outside and cook it yourself as much as you want.It was a really fun place and quite novel although the owner must be quite savvy.How has he turned paying to eat in a restaurant where you have to the cook yourself into such a cult?As it was quite expensive Olli and Suzanne didn't eat there.Instead they thought it would be fun to do anything they could to distract me from my meal and in the end I banished them from my table until I had finished.

Unfortunately on Saturday, our last night in Sydney, we discovered when we tried to rebook our room that it was already booked.The street we were staying in though was backpackers central so we wandered up to travellers rest and booked in there.Now in the past I have moaned about some hostel owners being in the wrong job but the person behind this desk was actually the worst person I have come across in my whole life.She was openly rude and hostile all the time with a smug superior look on her face.I really don't know what she was smug about though unless she thinks being the most hated person working part time at one of the worst hostels I have ever stayed in is something to be proud of.She would actually explain something to me then follow it up with tell that to your friends because I can't be bothered to repeat it and I will not.

We chilled in the room watching films most of the day and Marco cooked us up a really nice Italian meal before me and Marco headed out for a few drinks.It transpired that we had been put in the night manager's room and he didn't especially like people staying there and was a little odd.He had been around the room explaining that this was his special cup, please do not use his special cup, this was he special spoon, please do not use this etc.He did however agree with us regarding the women downstairs.Everyone hated the women who had been on the desk and not to worry about the 9am checkout, we could leave later and it would be fine.

At 9.30 the Nazi came to our door and explained we had to leave right then or we would not get our key deposits back.Me and Olli were down at the front 5 minutes later and Marco 10.She decided that she could have some fun as well as make a point so after giving us a dressing down and our deposits back would not give Marco his.Despite his best efforts, demanding to talk to the owner, and threatening to call the police (that one was funny) all the time remaining polite in the face of her rudeness he could not get his money.In the end she said she was going to ignore him and turned away saying she would not turn around again until he was gone.He took this opportunity to go into the kitchen and steal the kettle which he figured was worth about the same as the key deposit.An eye for an eye and all that.

That evening we took the best bus in the world down to Melbourne.It had a driver and a sort of co driver for safety as well as TV's playing DVDs and a huge amount of leg room.We arrived at about 8am and met Matt just outside the Campus where he then took us into his office (where every member of staff had been prepped to ask Olli about his Herpongina) and sorted us with some maps to get to his place which was about 30 mins by bus from the city centre.

We stayed with Matt and Bevon (who by now should need no introduction) for over a week and they were great hosts giving us a free run of the place whilst they were at work and Uni and then getting the Beer flowing and taking us out as soon as they were back.I would like to say that our days were spent productively looking around the city before the night festivities would begin but they made it far to easy to procrastinate in front of a big TV, on large comfy sofas with the huge DVD collection to hand.

Matt and Bevon have one other house mate who was there when we arrived.Will "the builder of dreams" was like the other two- incredibly laid back, only rising from his chair when we arrived to shake our hands and let us know where the beer was.He had an excellent sense of humour and was always cheerful however hung over he got

We also finally got the chance to meet Bevon's fine girlfriend Sarah.I had been worried that having a girlfriend around would make Bevon a little bit, well, boring.However Sarah turned out to be good fun and always the first to grab a glass of wine.Also if you wanted him to do anything for you as you were feeling particularly lazy all you had to do was ask via his girlfriend and he would do it.So much fun!

On our first nights stay Matt had arranged a little light exercise for us in the form of filling the two gaps in his Netball team that week.I had got this completely muddled up with Volley ball so had no idea what I was doing what so ever.The game was delayed because just as we were about to start someone pointed out that I would need to take all my leather bracelets and things my wrists have accumulated since Janruary off and some were pretty stuck on there.We were coached as we went along by the other players and after the first 10 minutes the ref pretty much gave up calling on the fouls that me and Olli made as the game would never have finished.However by half time we had a loose grasp on things so started narrowing the scores down and in the end lost but not as badly as we could have done.Netball is also awesome fun and I think it should be less of a girls game in the UK

On the Wednesday night (20th April by now) night we went out with a few of "the houses" other mates for a meal and then stayed for a few drinks.When we left Olli thought it would be good to get in the mood for Asia so whilst waiting for the bus home disappeared with Bevon and came back from a Chinese shop with a huge chunk of dried fish, seaweed and an unknown Chinese drink which I enjoyed very much.We couldn't get enough of the seaweed until we tried it in a more sober state the next day. Matt was bravely/stupidly the only one who would touch the fish.

By Thursday night I had a pretty sore throat but I was hoping that it was one of those throats which is the prelude for a cold.If it was then university experience had taught me that an epic night out would normally cure it with the only side effect being a hangover.

I woke up on Friday and not only did I have the expected side effect of an epic night out but an even worse throat.We all went to a regular haunt of the house to sort ourselves out.A sandwich bar called Chair 14 has been the houses haunt on hung over days many times before so we were expertly steered towards the club sandwiches and large coffees.They were excellent.

We were now on the first day of the long Easter weekend which also incorporates Anzak day (remembrance day for the soldiers) creating a 5 day long weekend so it was seen fit that we got back to the house we move the living room furniture into the garden to chill out in the sun with a couple of cold ones.

That evening we took a two hour train down to Colac with Matt.His mum and dad had been really kind and said we could stay at their farm over the Easter weekend.After we had been picked up and had a much needed meal we had a little wander round in the dark before watching a few films and getting a reasonably early nights sleep.We had been warned that since we were on a cattle farm we may be woken up early.

On Saturday Matts mum took us on an awesome drive all around the area.It was like having an expert tour guide with us.First off we went to the 12 apostles which are along the great ocean road.After that we were pleasantly surprised to find his mum had packed a huge lunch of chicken, rolls and, wait for it, vegetables.This would be the first time I had eaten anything that had been picked instead of killed since leaving NZ so it was warmly welcomed.

After we had all eaten we went a national park where we were able to go on a walk through the edge of the rain forest.This was like stepping into a completely different world where suddenly everything was damp and dark - every time you thought you were going to see some light through the canopy you would spot an even taller tree.The only slight letdown was that when we had followed the signs for the 300 year old tree to their logical conclusion we found it had fallen down.Someone should tell the people that run the park about that.

Next we headed for the small town of Apollo Bay where they have a holiday home for a snack before driving back to the farm through the hills.On our drive not only did we catch a glimpse of a Wallaby but also got to stop and look at some koala's.This was rather funny as once a few cars had stopped and we had all gathered around a tree to photograph a poor bemused Koala more and more people would stop to see what was going on.More often then not it would be a local who stopped only to roll their eyes and drove off.

That night we all crammed into Matt's dads' pickup and headed into the town then headed into the town to see some of Matt's old school friends for a reunion.For him of course, not us.They were all awesome guys and made us feel very welcome.We also were witness to some fantastic examples of "revertigo".

The one almost low point of the night was when the host introduced us to his younger brother.Being the polite English gentlemen I naturally put my hand out to shake his and was blanked until he was told to shake it.Afterwards I asked Matt if he was all there to be told he was pretty much blind.Still it was taken lightly, especially as they referred to him as the hobgoblin.To his face.

We were also introduced to another drinking game by matt.This time it was called the bag race.Sounds fairly innocuous but in fact involves putting a brown paper bag around your bottle of beer and then before downing it setting the thing on fire.For anyone who struggles with downing from the bottle it certainly concentrates the mind.It's not as dangerous as it sounds though as you are pointing the bag and bottle up.It burns down slowly and all the heat goes upwards away from you.

The next day (after a huge Burger King breakfast all round) we headed back to the farm where we all went to sleep for a bit before waking up for lunch.Me and Olli were again bowled over by the generosity and hospitality of Matts parents.We hadn't given much thought to Easter Sunday other then what our families would be up to and more importantly eating so were very surprised and very happy when Matts mum and dad said they would take us out to a restaurant they often go to.The meal was amazing but the highlight had to be Matts mum buying me not one but two pots of Earl Grey.A taste of home. It was really nice to spend Easter Sunday properly with a family and I didn't think the day could have got any better.Then it did.

After getting back from the meal we had an explore with Matt and then him and his dad drove us all around the farm until we had seen mobs of kangaroos charging around the place as well as quite a tame heard of Alpacas.Naturally I was wearing "the hat".We also helped his dad put a new electric fence in place to divide a field and how to check a fence was working with grass.

After dinner we all headed back to Melbourne on the train. I was taking my ibruprophen and strepsils regularly but to no avail so took it easy when we got back replacing beer for the chocolate egg that Sarah had bought everyone! I also thought I would ring my parents.

Having checked when the best time not to call would be (halfway through a family dinner with my aunt, uncle and cousins) I made the call and explained that if they out the laptop on the table add the webcams they could greatly enhance their meal by pretending I was there!

Monday was Anzac day and in true Australian fashion after the early dawn remembrance service all the pubs open early and the derby's are played.My throat was no better, probably worse and I had a pretty bad nights sleep.There was a very real danger it would interfere with the day.I decided that I would come to the pub but not participate in the drinking (too much).On the way to one of the locals I popped into a pharmacy to see if they could give me some antibiotics for my throat.

At this point I shall tell you about the strangest shopping centre I have ever been in.It is about 10 minutes from the house and has two of everything.I kid you not it has two large supermarkets, two large pharmacies and so on.Everything is doubled up and it just does not make sense.You can walk from one shop to its double in every case in less then 5 minutes.

This is precisely what I did and no, neither pharmacist would give me anything.I would need a prescription but good luck finding a doctor to get one until Thursday.Guys please if you are going to get ill in Auz do not do it over Anzac day.The only one they knew was open was miles away.By the time I got to the pub I could barely stand up and I was sweating bullets so I went back to the house and had a look at the bus timetables.

Looking at bus timetables for local busses is something I try to avoid at all costs.They are designed for local people and as such made very little sense.I managed to find an auto planner somewhere online so set off for what I was told would be a one hour journey.

Two and a half hours later and with the help of countless locals I arrived at the doctors' surgery.By this point I was pretty pissed off and really just wanted to see a doc and go home.The receptionist on the other hand, like a lot of people, was glad to have a pomm to herself and wanted to talk about the royal wedding.Now I would be happy to disappoint her with my lack of knowledge regarding the royal wedding at length with her once I had seen the doctor but please not before.

When I had eventually got through to the surgery all he wanted to do was discuss it and he was shocked that I would come travelling when it was going to happen.I tried to dismiss the wedding as quickly as possible so he could just sign my prescription and he looked quite crest fallen.It suddenly dawned on me I was being quite mean.So many people I had met around the world were following the news regarding the wedding religiously and therefore delighted to have someone from England to talk to about it only to have them dismiss it.It's not that I don't care.I am just genuinely quite cut off and separated from all current affairs, like they are for someone in another life.Anyway I decided that from then on I would show a little more enthusiasm.Oh and eventually I did indeed get my antibiotics.

The ride back was even better as when a bus eventually arrived and took me to the stop I would change at, the next bus that would take me to the house had stopped running (it wasn't even 9pm yet).I started to make the walk there that I guessed would take about 45 mins but once halfway got the taxi.I say it again public transport is useless.

We had planned on leaving the house Tuesday originally but the busses were not yet running as it was still the bank holiday.Matt, Bevon and Will were completely relaxed about how long we stayed so in the end I left Thursday night (by which time I was almost better) and Olli on Friday.

I got into Sydney on Friday morning and made the trek across town to the hostel.I arrived back at chilli blue at around 8am and as I was checking in met Suzanne and Scott checking out.They had been pretty quick regarding their house and having already found tenants to replace them and were in the process of looking for other places.

Olli had wanted to stay at Bondi beach so over the next few days I went out with the new and old faces in Chilli Blue as well as Jack and his friends from his new hostel.He hadn't been allowed to renew his stay for some reason.We went to all the normal bars as well as a house party in the city which was good fun.I also made good friends with a guy from Quebec.He was stuck without money for a few days so I leant him some dollars.I would not be in the hostel when he checked out but as promised it was all waiting for me on my bed with a really nice note.It seems that like Kevin from New Caledonia French citizens not from France can be quite decent.

All the going out of course meant that I would rarely be out of bed before 4 or 5 pm.My roommates were very impressed when I managed to get out of bed before 3pm to play in a hostel game of football.It was mostly France (they really don't like mixing) VS rest of the world and I am pleased to say we put them in their place.

On Tuesday, still very sore from the football, sporting a hangover and having gone to bed again at around 4am I really impressed my roommates by being up at 730.I was being picked up around the corner just after 8am by one of the local surf schools.There were five of us in total and we spent all day learning how to surf only stopping for a BBQ and footy break to warm us up.By the time we were fished we could all stand up on fairly decent waves.It you are taught properly from the start its not actually to hard.

That night was a bit more chilled as I met up with Scott, Suzanne and her dad who was in Sydney on business for a pub quiz which we didn't do to badly in and the next day went to a house party where they had just moved out from.All the local knowledge certainly found me in more decent places spending less money.

Later in the week Olli came back to the Hostel although he was put in a different room.Again there was not really much done in the day as we had seen as much in the city as we wanted to.One of final things we did get to see though was Suzanne and Scott's new flat.Insanely large and with view of the harbour as well as the entire city I was pleased that they had found somewhere they were happy with again.

On Sunday the 8th we headed back to the airport to head off for our next adventure.This though was not without its drama as when we went to check in they did not have any seats for us.Once again Air New Zealand, my now least favourite airline had messed up big time.After some investigation by the helpful lady at the Virgin Atlantic address we discovered they have made a change to our final flight home and not told us.At the same time they had also cancelled our reservation with Virgin for this leg.Fortunately they had empty seats so put us in those.When we went to the Air NZ check in desk to see when our flights were but there was only one woman there who could not be bothered, she was going to go on lunch I think.We could check at the office upstairs but they would be on lunch as well.

We still don't know when we are flying back now.Could be back home 10 minutes late or early.Could be days!