22/02/09

Woke up at 0515, checked out, rammed our bags in storage and had a peanut butter sandwich for breakfast. The Rock Tour bus arrived and we all hopped on. As we were leaving Alice Springs I saw a sign for the nearest towns, Tennant Creek 516 Km, Darwin 1502 Km! We drove for hours and hours, stopping every now and then to fill up with fuel. Greg made all 20 of us on the bus go up to the front and introduce ourselves to the group, which really broke the ice. Everyone had to answer a set of standard questions, which foot they hopped on, favourite colour and which super power they would like to have. We then all played a bit of musical chairs and sat next to some randoms to get to know each other a little bit better, I ended up sat next to some Swiss girl that I still can not remember the name of, she didn't seem to want to talk at all, everything I said to her she seemed to ignore. After much traveling I realised that I had been drinking a lot of water, my 3 litres were gone and I desperately needed the loo. Just as I was about to ask Greg to stop the bus he pulled over at a random spot and told us that this was the first toilet stop, get in! I rushed out and had a slash, as I was returning I caught a rather nasty sight of the old Danish woman squatting in the open, not anywhere near a bush or anything. Coops was moaning yesterday about how sick she was of ham sandwiches, we were handed ham rolls for lunch. Along the way Greg managed to convince us that we could see Uluru from the window, after we had all attempted to get as many photos as possible through the window of a moving bus of a rock in the distance he informed us that it was called Fooluru and was not actually Ayers Rock.

Our first stop was Kings Canyon, we all had to take 3 litres of water with us on the walk so we filled up our bottles from the 'drinking water' taps, the water all tasted like crap and gave me such a bad stomach ache, but we had to drink as much as possible beacause sweat was literally evaporating off us at the same rate we could drink the water. The Danish bloke couldn't join in the walk as he had a dodgy knee, I have no idea what he did for the 3 hours we were out. We started off at heart attack hill. Very hot and very tiring, we got to the top and had a rest while taking in the view and listening to some of Gregs explanations about how the canyon and creeks were created. We then walked along the top of the canyon taking hundreds of pictures of rocks along the way. Bruno, the Italian guy, was always at the back getting someone to take a photo of him in front of just about every rock he saw. When we stopped at a random Eucalyputus tree on top of the Canyon Greg joked that a Koala lived there and Bruno went crazy when he realised there was 'no Koala', which fast became a catchphrase of the journey. We spotted a tiny Gecko that looked like it was smiling at us so everyone got a photo of that and we headed on towards the pool where we slid in to cool off. I think things like that are what make these trips, the guides make you as hot and sweaty and as uncomfortable as possible then take you somewhere they can remedy it so you love it. We attempted to get photos of each other with our arms in the air while swimming but all kept sinking. It was quite funny watching Helen and Coops attempting to get out of the pool, they had no idea how to do it, Helen was splashing around for about 3 minutes with Pat pushing her from the arse to try and help her out with no luck, the whole group were laughing at them. We got back to the van at about 2 all feeling hot and sweaty and seriously flied out, there were so many flies about, we were so glad we had our nets, the moment we took the nets off we had flies crawling all over our faces, the worst ones would try to crawl up your nose, so frustrating.

On the way back we had to collect some fire wood. There was plenty to chose from as most of the trees around here were already dead anyway. Burns and I found a tree each and dragged them back to the trailer. Everyone got so many splinters and thorns from walking throught he spinefects. As we were loading the wood on the trailer burns managed to gash his head open. We drove to the camp site but didn't get there until after dark so it was quite difficult getting everything sorted out. We got all of the Swags out of the bus, it was then that I realised Helen had left one of her water bottles with the lid off and it had poured pretty much in to my bag soaking all of my clothes and my book. We all formed a line and passed the Swags from one end in to a heap on the floor then spread them in a circle around the fireplace. Once we had the fire going for a while we got the cooking on the go. Rich, Pat and James were in charge of stiring the chilie con carne, and everyone else did shifts on stiring the pots of veg for 1 minute at a time as it was so hot near the fire. The food was great when it was finally cooked. Washing up in the dark was really hard though and the two Swiss girls and the old Danish man definately didn't pull their weight. I spent about half an hour scrubbing the big that had the veg in it.

As we were rolling out our swags to go to sleep Coops pointed at something on the floor where I was about to roll mine out and asked what it was, when I shone my camera light on it and we saw that it was a scorpion there was a rather loud screech followed by Coops standing up and moving the fasted I've ever seen her move. When we'd finally moved the scorpion a little further away from our sleeping area there was a giant cockroach at the end of Coops' Swag so it was another 20 minutes before we were able to lie down. I woke up in the night freezing because I had no sleeping bag, everyone else seemed to have remembered to order one. As I was zipping up my Swag and putting my towel over me Coops woke up and was bursting for a piss, when she'd finished we realised that we cold see as many stars as on Fraser and managed to find the southern cross finally.

23/02/09

We were woken early by Greg, all we had time to do in the morning was to roll our swags up put them back on the trailer and clean our teeth. Greg then told us that the pots and pans needed another scrub because we had done a crap job, no one voluntered to wash up so I ended up doing it again. Lazy arse Swiss girls are just as bad as the Brazilians from Fraser Island. We hopped into the bus and drove to Kata Tjuta. Here we donned our fly nets again and went on another hike round the back of some of the rocks there. Greg couldn't join us as he broke his shoes on the way so he told us where to go and left us to it. It was so hot during the day, the weather forecasts only give out temperatures in the shade, and they predicted it would reach 39, apparently it was over 46 in the sun, so I was drinking plenty of water. I ended up drinking it through the fly net as I started to get rather pissed off with the flies getting inside it. It took us a good hour and a half to get to the look out at the top of what seemed like the steepest hill in the world. The Danish woman went for a slash just a metre off the track, completely uncovered again, what a wierdo. We got back to where Greg was waiting for us and I took off my bag, as it hit the floor thousands of flies flew off it in a giant swarm, it was rank. We saw a red backed spider under one of the benches while Greg was entertaining us with some creation stories. By the time we made it back to the van I had drunk about 9 litres of water and had about 5 wees.

We made it to a look out spot where we could see both Kata Tjuta and Uluru at the same time, so we stopped here and got a few photos. I got the best photo of Helen, she had a wierd tuft going on on the top of her head. As Bruno was asking us for so many photos of himself we thought we'd ask him to return the favour, he's not the best photographer. We headed off to eat lunch at the Culture Centre, we had left over chilie con carne in a wrap with other salad and stuff for lunch. Eating lunch in the outback during midday is a nightmare, you have to constantly wave your hand in front of the food to keep them off you and then stuff it into your mouth as quickly as possible making sure that none land on your lips or crawl up your nose in the process. I would be very impressed if any of us managed to eat our food without consuming a fly today. Once we had finished eating we spent an hour in the culture centre reading all the creation stories and how much the Anangu would love it if we would respect their beliefs and stay off Uluru. Greg took us on a brief tour around some of the spots on Uluru and showed us the creation stories behind each one. We then saw some of the art work scribed in to the rock. By the time we were in the last place I was getting rather fidgety due to the intense heat, I just couldn't stand it any more and I'm pretty sure everyone else was in the same situation, Greg must have picked up on it so he left us to explore the next part on our own and brought the bus around so we wouldn't have to walk so far, what a legend.

He took us to sun set spot and we formed another line while we passed the Swags off the bus and set them up in a row for viewing it. We were there first so got a really good view and had plenty of time to get some decent photos. The group of 3 German girls who were on our trip that kept themselves to themselves were taking hundreds of photos of a teddy of what looked like Kermit the Frog. We were chatting to Greg about our white thighs and he was only too happy to show us his, we just had to get a photo of us all with our white bits out in front of Ayers Rock. A few of us helped Greg cook then left him alone to stir the pot while we continued to enjoy ourselves. We set up a group photo and we got Greg to leave the stiring for a minute while we took it, he rushed over and slid across the floor to be as quick as possible cutting his legs in the process, Coops unfortunately made the mistake of getting an old foreign man to take the photo. He had no idea how the thing worked. He was stood there for about 2 minutes trying to wind on a digital camera, I couldn't stop laughing, when he finally realised how to take the photo he took one of us all in front of the fence completely missing out Ayers Rock. We waited for him to leave and set one up on a timer. We ate food while the sun set, but some clouds had set in between the sun and Uluru so it didn't go very red at all, it just seemed to go grey. We washed up after dinner, the Swiss girls got in there first and I thought they may actually do some work for once as everyone elses plates were stacked in front of them, but I was wrong, they just washed up their own then wandered off. Coops washed up eveyones plates whilst James and I washed up the pots yet again.

We headed back to camp where we had the luxury of a shower and toilet. As I took off my sandals in the evening I had the most disgusting white line where the strap had been, the rest of my feet were browny orange. Pat, Rich and I went for a shower, all the showers were brilliant, although some t*** had put in a completely uneccessary shelf right underneath where the shower head was so you couldn't stand under it properly. When I got back to the camp I realised that someone had pikeyed my Swag so I chose the nearest one with no sleeping bag on it and climbed in. We all spent the next half hour slating the shower design then one of the lazy Swiss girls came back from the shower and started having a go at me for stealing her swag, I explained to her how mine had been stolen, she didn't seem happy, even though I know she didn't bother getting her own Swag out of the trailer anyway, lazy b****. When she came back with her swag she chucked it right at my face and then rolled it out in a huff, these things are fairly heavy, I'm surprised it didn't give me a nose bleed, what a slag. Bruno came back from the showers and had also had his Swag stolen, probably by the Swiss girl, he made a right song and dance about it moaning about there being no Koalas all the time. As we were trying to get to sleep I saw 4 shooting stars, and Rich and I started talking about some pretty rank things, forgetting that there was a 16 year old here with her parents.

24/02/09

We were woken up at 0430 and rolled our swags, mine was by far rolled the tightest, then cleaned our teeth and we were on our way. We arrived at the lookout for the sun rise and watched as Bruno went mental taking hundreds of photos. We were the first ones on site again and were able to have breakfast as the sun was rising. We had loads of Weet-Bix, but b***** all milk, so I ended up eating them dry. We got a group sequence photo of us all hopping on our prefered foot as the sun rose. We then went to the Uluru base walk, Greg left us to it and we all went for a wander around the rock. It took us 2 hours to get all the way round it, 9km in total. We saw all the areas from all the creation stories of the Anangu. We had to leave Bruno behind as he was taking far too long with all his photos. When we got back to the van at 9 there was fruit cake, so I had a piece, eating it as fast as possible before the flies got to it. When Bruno got back he was sweating because he had been running. He had asked some randoms what the time was and they had given him the wrong time, so he thought he was an hour late. we quickly realised that he was not the last person back, but we were in fact waiting for the old Danish couple. Bruno, whose English isn't the best, told Greg that they were waiting at the next car park on the way around. So Greg trusted him and drove to the next car park, when they weren't there he started to look a little bit worried, luckily they were at the next one on. I filled up my water bottle from the drinking water tap, but ended up with about 10 ants in it. The water also tasted like petrol, so I had to throw it away.

We had to say bye to Bruno at the Airport on the way back so there were no more Koalas. At least we wouldn't be waiting an extra 5 minutes at each stop any more. The ride back was a long one and I had no water, so I was happy when we stopped for lunch. I bought a giant bottle of water and chugged the lot, then got a powerade. The last lunch in the fly infested outback, it had to be the worst one yet, someone left the lid off the tuna and it was literally full of flies. Laura, the Dutch girl, insisted on having peanut butter, cheese and sugar sandwiches. We had one last stop on the way back at a Camel Ranch where we all had a go at riding the Camels and finding out as much as we could about how they were imported and what they were used for. Katherine who was here with her parents finally got on one after being promised it was completely safe by the handler. Her mother was dubious as she had fallen off one when she was younger and broken her arm. As the camel was trotting back to the finish line it completely stacked in on its face and she flew over its head and landed in flat in the sand, it looked rather painful but she stood up and shook it off as if nothing had happened. The handler said thats the first time he's seen a Camel fall in 20 years.

We finally got back to Alice Springs at about 1800 and all made full use of the showers before going out for a meal in Toddy's bar as a group. I thought I'd try some camel and Burns followed suit. We all sat around a huge table reserved for Greg's group, alongside the other Rock Tour group led by Jesus. Our group was clearly the best, Jesus walked in and sat down at the table and no one acknowledged his presence, when Greg walked in a few minutes later he recieved a round of applause and cheering that lasted a good minute. The camel finally arrived, tastes just like beef, really nice, shame about the s*** corn on the cob though. As I handed my plate across to the waitress for her to take it away, both Burns and I heard her say 'c*** bag', no one knows what she actually said but surley it cant have been that. When we had finished, Greg passed around his 'comments book', which I thought would be a brief couple of lines each, the Germans and Swiss girls had other ideas, they each wrote essays taking a good hour between the 5 of them to finish. By the time it got to us we were nearly ready to head off to the bar in town. This bar has to be the best bar ever. James was pretty pissed when he arrived and was rather confused by the toilet system, the doors have handles and fake hinges on the wrong side, the row of 4 sinks have taps that operate the faucets on the other sinks, and the buttons on the dryers operate the wrong dryers. We all pitched in and bought Greg a jug to chug, he told us that he wasn't English and had tried it before with a Scouser unsuccessfuly, so Rich and Pat helped him down it.