...And if you look at the wine you will see a dark crimson colour highlighted with flecks of light piercing through the glass. Now swirl the wine allowing the air to infiltrate and exaggerate the intense aromas, you will be able to smell the blueberries, strawberries, plums, cherries, apples, pears and every other fruit that has ever grown on this planet, oh yeah and don't forget the FRENCH oak? Why bloody french? Surely there must be oak trees closer than France. Finally the tasting, ah yes the tasting. What can be said about this? the flavours hitting my tongue, my taste buds and that final little tickle of my throat? the incredible beauty of this fine wine? Or how about the incredible, overpowering, suffocating feeling that is incurred when a glass of Pegasus Pinot Noir (Vintage) is inhaled and suffered before the wretching and urge to violently regurgitate your dinner sets in!!!! It's safe to say, we have scratched the surface of fine wines and been rejected, returning to cheap easy to drink plonk available from all good Lidl outlets!!! (and just in case you were worried we had simply tasted a bad batch, a subsequent tasting at the Montana winery (largest producer in NZ) confirmed that we were right originally and Pinot Noir is made purely for those with no sense of taste or smell!!!)

After our week in the Queenstown area it was time for us to start on our winding way back up. First stop was Wanaka, about an hour north of Q'town. We arrived in scorching weather and enjoyed time relaxing by the lake and visiting a puzzle world, with several attractions that messed with your head. Over night though, the clouds came over and the heavens opened, resulting in one of the scariest but also most amazing drives ever. We had a 4 hour drive to Franz Josef, a small town on the west coast, that involved crossing over a mountain range and then driving along the foothills of another range. At first the views were incredible with waterfalls flowing over the cliffs, and then, we turned a corner to find a waterfall flowing over a cliff and into the middle of the road. Now this is certainly nothing we have experienced before and poses an interesting obstacle, especially when you have a 30 meter drop on one side and a cliff face on the other. The only way was forward and so with windscreen wipers on full blast (really useful!!!!) we ploughed through the middle praying Bindi would not be crushed in the process. This then continued to be a theme of the by now very slow drive, which just for good measure decided to throw in a few small areas of flooding, just to test if Bindi's underside was also waterproof (It's not!). Eventually though, it all became to much and we hit a traffic jam. Now this just does not happen in NZ so we began killing time with possible theories of the cause; accident? To grim! waterfall? Hadn't stopped us yet! Sheep got so wet that they had become too heavy, lost balance, fallen off mountain and now lying in crumbled mess in middle of road like a pile of used squeegees? possibly! After 3 hours we got moving again, driving through the sheep which were acting like a giant car wash (only joking). The actual cause had been a burst river bank which had cut us off 20 miles from our destination, typical!!

The reason for our trip to Franz Josef was for a day hike on the glacier that towers over the town. Unfortunately due to all the rain it was to dangerous for us to go up there on our booked tour and we were left crossing our fingers in the hope that we'd be able to go the following day. Luckily the rain eased off and we were able to head up there, not so luckily though, all the guides tracks had been washed away and so we were the guinea pig group heading up there first to establish new tracks. We had expected a nice gentile stroll across the glacier, and it wasnt until we had climb 15ft up the sheer glacier face that we realised this was actually going to be a lot harder and more dangerous than first anticipated! It was an amazing experience wandering our way through the ice, along freshly carved steps and over crevasses that drop 30ft down under the ice. There were a few wobbly moments but 8 hours later we happily made our way off the ice and onto dry land! As we were heading away from the Glacier, our guide (a big maori guy) had a radio call to say that a woman had fallen down a crevasse in the group behind us! eek!

After our adventure on the glacier, we continued on our route heading north before cutting across country over Arthurs Pass and finally in to Christchurch. Once in C'church we settled into cell 32 of our Jailhouse accommodation. The hostel was a former jail that had closed about 10 years ago and been made into the best place we've stayed at, with all the original doors still in place so if feels like you're being locked away at night. C'church is considered to be very english in style, very similar to Cambridge in its layout and place names with punting on the River Avon which runs through it! We spent a few days here wandering around before heading up north again to Hamner Springs where we spent a day relaxing in the natural springs this area is famed for. After this we headed to Nelson and then up to Abel Tasman National Park, which is possibly the most beautiful part of New Zealand with its stunning beaches, and beautiful coastine. We spent several days hiking and relaxing on the beach here.

On leaving the south island we stopped at Taupo and from here we did the Tongariro Crossing, a 19.4km hike across Mt Tongariro,and Mt Ngarahu also known as Mordor to those Lord of the Rings fans. We had been trying to attempt this walk before we left New Plymouth, but were unable to do it as the weather was always too bad. We were extremely lucky on the day we picked, as despite an uncertain weather forecast we hit the track, and as we started to walk the sun came out and we had beautiful clear blue skies for half the walk which allowed us to see all the most beautiful scenery. We stopped for lunch at the Emerald pools (bright blue mineral on the ridge between the volcanoes) and just as we started walking again the clouds came over and our visibility was reduced to 10 metres, it gave it a very eerie feel and was prime weather for orcs!

Moving on from New Zealand on the 31st January...

FIJI

"More Brits, oh great!!!" was the cry from guests on the tiny Mantaray Island as the next group of arrivals stepped foot onto the beach. This does appear to be a theme and unfortunately, we are in agreement with them. This frustration was not aimed at our arrival, but at the group of twelve 18-21 drunken louts who descended onto the beach, beer bottles underarm, and tanning oil gleeming off their burnt bodies! (rant beginning - why do young brits (we now consider ourselves old) feel the need to get as drunk as possible wherever they are? Pay no respect to any other guests? And generally act like a bunch of w#@*$%s? This has been the theme from the moment we landed in Oz and continued everywhere else, with each day consisting of getting drunk until the early hours, lying in bed until the afternoon, then getting up and getting drunk again and not visiting any of the sites in beautiful places such as Sydney and Melbourne? Brits are hated by all other travellers and with good reason. The solution? A selective breeding program combined with Britain purchasing the island of Ibiza and shipping all louts off there until they destroy their livers!! - rant over) Apart from this, Fiji was absolutely stunning and exactly as you would picture it: Remote Islands, with sandy beaches and green forrests, a few grass huts and beautiful clear blue water.

We arrived on Mantaray Island to a Bula welcome song from the staff which was lovely, then given a fruit cocktail, and taken out to a very nice looking bure (grass hut) which was to be our home. We proceeded to spend the next few days moving from hammock to sunlounger to snorkeling, with these activities interspersed with some incredible meals and Mantaray soon became known as the island with the best food so we were very pleased with our choice! In the evenings we were provided with great entertainment, including the Village people (not of the YMCA variety before you ask) from the local village, who gave us a song and dance performance which of course Jue had to be involved in and was soon prancing around the hut with some very large muscular Fijians with war sticks! All in all we had a lovely relaxing few days in Fiji...

US of A

After our quick tanning session we made the long flight to the US to meet up with Anna-Maija and Zack (thats Zack with a K), 2 budding young performers on the fringe of taking Hollywood by storm and replacing Brangelina as the celebrity couple of choice, you heard it here first!!. Jue's friends who have kindly agreed to provide us with luxury accommodation and hospitality for the first 10 days in LA. For now we're just taking it easy and being shown the sites of LA with our personal tour guides and enjoying having some space to stretch out in.

Next time you hear from us, we'll be millionaires after taking the Bellagio to the cleaners and bankrupting the MGM. As for now, this is us signing off and wishing you all a very merry February.