Seyda dalene you and i both know you're not too old, so you can't use that excuse I know exaltcy what you mean about those dream' locations, i think they are awesome for a finite period but the travel industry force feeds us those as an idyllic place, when i'd much rather get lost in some town in the middle of nowhere The anxiety and paranoia are nothing to worry about i reckon, the awesome thing about backpacking is that u can set off for an indefinite amount of time and if it's not going well, just set-up shop wherever you like or go home maybe that's a week into your trip or 2 years in, either way there's always an escape route!