"I NO f*** YOU!" "I NO f*** YOU!" "Alright love, there's no need to shout it quite so loud'....I thought. He went on and on "I NO f***ING YOU, I NO f*** YOU!!!" With a cynical look I said to the cabby "Didn't fancy you anyway!' ha ha. Not really, I said 'Yeah, yeah, whatever you think, just give me my bag and take your money'. He'd added another 30 Ringits onto the fair to the airport because 'the traffic was heavy'.....I swear they make it up as they go along and I have 'I'm a stupid single white female, come rip me off' written over my forehead (I'd have to have a big forehead I know but....) I walked across the runway to the aircraft for my flight back to Kuala Lumpa only be greeted by a huge Wayne Rooney above me, ooo-eerr, (he is such a fugly). There I was in stunning and remote Borneo, with Manchester flaming United (sponsors of Air Asia) all around me, what is the world coming to I ask you! Upon arrival in KL I wondered if by chance their would be a flight I could jump on to get me to Singapore the same day. I got the bus to the main terminal where I was told that Singapore Air was on the 4th floor. I wondered and wondered. My surroundings becoming more and more 'office' like the futher I went and then from 'office like to loading bay like'. With spinal compression and curvature I came to a dead end at which point I turned on my heel, looked to the sky and said aloud 'for f-s sake'. "Can I help you mam?' A voice came from behind me. I quickly explained my situation. "Follow me" the man said. So in the spirit of not knowing my arse from my elbow I followed...... and followed... and followed..... Eventually we emerged at check in, expect I was on the wrong side. I had actually wondered into the area where all the bags are checked in and then sent off on a maze of tunnels and belts in order to get to the correct aircraft! ha ha, I thought it was highly amusing. I'm on the wrong side of the check in desks, with all the passengers and staff staring at me. "Brilliant", I laughed to myself. Trust me to approach ever situation from the opposite direction of the rest of the world, still it got me what I needed and I boarded a flight to Singapore just one hour later - result. My stay in Singapore this time has been rather more sedate than the visit with my parents sadly but I have had a wonderful relaxing time. Lots and lots of gym (and Naomi, before you say 'Amy, how are we friends?' understand that I have to take it where I can get it!....and the gym boom boom), reading, swimming and sunbathing - a hard hard life. The main reason for my stay was to obtain 2 visa's, one for Vietnam and one for India. My Vietnamese visa was issued within one week without trial or tribulation. Sadly, the India one wasn't so straight forward. I got up early and cabbed it to the Embassy and queued with a 3rd of the population of India (in total I did this 4 times). Eventually I was seen and told to return in one week for pick it up. So yesterday I turned up and queued again. As time went by more and more Indian men decided they would walk up to me, look me up and down with utter distaste and then stand in front of me, spitting (not at me but might as well have been). I don't think it was anything to do with being Western, moreover that I was female. Well, talk about queue rage! You can imagine the expletives going through my mind by the time I got in the embassy only to be told that they've stuffed up my app! I ended up having a ruck with Mr Sihn, the 'supervisor' there. I lectured him on good and bad customer service and was told to come back later. That I did, this time armed with my 'glare stare' at the queue jumpers. A stare that would burn their eyes out (you can tell I've thought about this too much can't you!) Following a small ruck inside about me being put to the front (given previous kufuffle), Mr Sihn awarded me my visa and I left. I later found out that I'd been rucking with the president of the Indian Embassy. The head honcho who has the final say who enters and who does not enter India. Oooppss..... Stomach soup anyone? Pigs Organ soup, Intestine soup and kidney soup! I kid you not, there is a restaurant here that sells nothing but these types of soups. You think they sound awful, you should see the pictures, just slushy aneamic looking puke. vile. Sorry, had to share :-) Well I'm off to Vietnam tomorrow (and I can't wait to shout 'GOOOOD MOORRRNNNIINNGGG VIIEEETTTTNNNAAAMMMMMMMMMM'!) and then Hong Kong. Sadly I have had to forego Cambodia due to ticket restraints and Military Coup (as was) restraints and swap it for Hong Kong instead. Thank you to everyone for your kind birthday wishes (I'm so old) and lovely messages.I'll post the 'Nam update in a week or so. Keep on rocking people! x