FRIDAY (Something?) of September ______________________________ Puno - Peru "Vic's Bowels Adventure" ______________________________ ...Puno, a surprisingly uneventiful and quite enjoyable 5 hour bus journey, musical entertainer, only one begger, and we arrived at our destination. Not making the same mistake as Ariguipa (long story) we decided to make the centre our base as far away from the bus terminal as possible! To the 'Mercado Centrali'and adding to our ever increasing list of íncreadable transportations', we rode on the front of a bicycle-powered-kart-like vehicle, which actually nimblerly darted in and out of the traffic much to Vic's horror. Our engine: a heavily panting boy of no more than 15, listening to a walkman obviously to take the pain away caused by the heavy load. The 2 Soles charge became 10 as the boy 'surprisingly' didn't have change. Nether-the-less a fee well deserved! After a couple of unsucessful hostel enquiries we we're lead down a side ally and found our ¨actually NOT so central base¨. Still a nice room, a double bed and what looked like a hot shower - after a 'menu touristic'we we're back making full advantage, considering getting tucked up at a time which cannot have been much after 6pm .......Heaven! (or should i say 'heaven' to two backpackers who felt like they'd been on their feet for days) ...6.15pm and the dream had ended! Victoria's body, either from the bike ride or 'Menu Touristic', had taken it upon itself to re-decorate the bathroom. Again and again the poor girl had to rush to the, luckery, en-suit bathroom in fear of dirtying the sheets. I, Myself, did pitty iccle squirty Vee but still somewhat wallowed in the blissfullness of the rest, totally unaware of the ever decreasing amount of what we would later attempt to call ¨Banyos Papiera¨(toilet paper) No Soon after the cardboard tube had spun its last time on the holder, i was down stairs speaking the lingo to the guy on reception who was seemingly to nod knowlingly. Keys in hand and climbing the steep stairs to our room, i still held faith that the translation had been sucessful and that i would be led to a peruvion version of 'the cleaning cupboard'! The Panic set in as my new Amigo placed the master key in our door and began to turn the lock.... ....in a mixture of not wanting to expose Miss Hall in a half dressed on-the-toilet-in-bed situation, and still wanting to PROVE my cross-cultural communicaion skills, i resorted to bending over and placing my hand on my Ass and serading a wiping motion whilst saying the words at an increased volume, which i would live to regret, : ¨BUM PAPER! ___________ Atempted surpressed giggles came from the 'still'locked door and my reception friend had turned knowingly and was headingly back down the stairs to reception again - Relief! Yet moments later, and to my amazment as i always pride myslef in my ability of serades at christmas, he had returned still 'Banyos Papiera'-less and more un-nerving was seconds from entering our 'smelly'home, room 17! I dont know who looked more shocked, but the look on Vic's face was priceless. Tucked up in bed, just returned from a toilet visit, she politely managed ¨Hola¨ then raised her arms to her face and engenously began motioning blowing her nose, but 'WHITOUT'the much needed and hard fought over toilet tissue (it actually looked more like she was Madonna 'Vogueing'from the 80's) ...But 5 minutes, and a few english words ending in 'Ó', later and we we're back in bed with the 'soft white, slightly quilted, hoily grail of toilet tissue sat between us - Happy! if only for a few minutes for Vic! An eventful evening we agreed even before the rat began to eat our Santiago biscuits and the monkey in the room next door woke before sounding to be sacrificed!? Vic's Stomach soon passed (actually to me the next morning) and we said ¨Benous Noches¨!!!