The locals like to call Munich 'München', and this being a funny word, so do I.
We arrived in München keen to get our first Oktoberfest started, but thought we'd get some sightseeing done and dusted, because we knew that once we stepped into our first beer tent the odds of us seeing the rest of München would diminish significantly. So we did the good ol' free walking tour that has got us by in so many cities with an American guide who described everything as being "a real hoot".. whatever that means. We learned about the crazy German royal family, including King Ludwig II who did all sorts of ridiculous stuff like invite a horse to a lavish dinner party, and his wacky aunt who ate an entire piano over the course of her lifetime in order to "aid digestion". The best part of the walking tour was the Glockenspiel, a cuckoo-clock rated as the 2nd most disappointing tourist attraction in Europe - and boy was it disappointing! It begins with a long 4 minutes of atonal bell tolls which leave the gathered tourists' arms shaking as they point their cameras at the Glockenspiel as not to miss the coming action. Then the action comes, a slow and lame jousting between two knights with a thrusting clown in the background. This happens for 12 minutes. Riveting stuff.
After we felt like we'd made an effort to be touristy we headed to Oktoberfest. I never really knew what it would be like, but it was cooler than I could have imagined. A huuuuge field of massive beer tents (one for each beer), roller-coasters, rides, games, Bavarian food and people in Lederhosen. 6.4 million people to be precise. Our time at Oktoberfest was not the best from a health perspective between our diet of wurst (every wurst tastes like frankfurters!), chicken and giant pretzels and our numerous giant litre beers. And on the topic of food, there was a pizza vending machine at our hostel. A PIZZA VENDING MACHINE. It comes hot in a cardboard box and everything! Technology these days...
We tried different beers each day, sharing a 'brüsht' with people young and old. The beer is truly in a different league to anything we get in Australia, to the point that I, not even a big beer drinker, was able to down a litre in one long enjoyable swig. We didn't limit our fun to the beer tents, playing game after game of bumper cars against the Germans we met to settle some fictional bumper car rivalry between our two countries. Needless to say we did Australia proud.
One day we visited a game which translates to 'devil circle' involving a big spinning platform that speeds up throwing players off with centrifugal force. Much skin was lost on the knees and elbows and hasn't grown back yet. They occasionally open the floor to two men who wish to have a boxing match on the platform while they spin it back and forth. Steve and I accepted the challenge, welcomed as the Australian warriors by the speaker who continued to make lots of jokes at our expense in German as we took to the stage. A lot of fun, but the platform beat us up more than we even beat up each other - alcohol and spinning do not go hand in hand.
The days flew by and the weekend approached, the busiest time at Oktoberfest, and incidentally Arryn's birthday. We took advantage of our hostels location across the road from the Augustiner brewery and went for a birthday dinner at the beerhall. This was my highlight of Munich. More intimate than the beertents we had traditional Bavarian food (meat, meat, meat, some meat, a pretzel, a dumpling and some redkraut) tried a few subtle varieties on the Augustiner brew and chatted with real Bavarian men. The two-man tuba and trombone band stood on our table and played a big happy birthday to Arryn while everyone joined in. They then quite rudely asked that we all tip them. When I gave the amount I could offer in my budget the trombonist threw it at me and cursed me for life. It was as if a small tip was better than no tip at all. This is just one example of Germans being, to put it nicely, frugal with money and possessions. On the way out of the restaurant a German man approached us while Zac was handing out gum to ask for some. Zac gave him a piece, and instead of being thankful he said, "I've been thinking. I've had a hard day. I deserve another one." When Zac looked at him confused he clarified himself; "I woke up early, I've been drinking all day, I deserve another one". Needless to say he was given no extra gum. He called Zac a "sticky man" and was on hid way.
The next day was Saturday, Arryn's birthday, so we lined up nice and early to get inside our favourite tent (we ranked the beers we tried as follows: Augustiner, Paulaner, Hacker-pschorr, Haufbräu). After an hour and a half of lining up we got to the front just as the security guards closed the doors claiming they weren't letting anyone in for a few hours. But I had a plan. I'd noticed a bathroom door inside that had a one way exit to outside. I managed to convince a German guy who had stopped the door closing with his foot to let us in if we brought him a beer (10 Euros). So we made it in, a great achievement, not soured even when I carried a beer through the bathroom to give to him and he said, completely seriously, "One? I want three!".
Germans...
On the whole despite their stinginess the Germans have proved to be very friendly people, in fact a few youngsters we met invited us to hang out for our last night in Munich in their small traditional village just out of town. We couldn't pronounce the village's name but it sounded like 'hell's kitchen' so that's what we called it. It was a good night, and speaking to our new friends I got the sense that they are very resentful of the past they were born into, the past that they didn't choose. I'm sure it must suck to be that bad guys in movies and to be obligated begrudgingly to learn about the acts committed in the name of their country.
Quite a sad ending to an otherwise jolly blog, but there you have it. Having immersed ourselves in Bavarian culture we leave for Berlin, Munich's funky, modern cousin, but I'm carrying around a hefty Oktoberfest beer glass to remember it by.